|
|
Post by lucille on Dec 4, 2009 0:31:54 GMT -5
where can i turn? cause iNEED SOMETHING MORE. SURROUNDED BY UNCERTAINTY. KADEN WILSON , 760 WORDS , CLOTHING , COMPLETE
waking up with a splitting headache the next morning brought memories of the night before flooding back. Kaden, Adia, some Ellie girl and a lot of tequila. She slowly sat up, regretting it as a wave of nausea washed over her. She swallowed, attempting to keep her stomach in her abdomen. She leaned forward and rest her head in her hands, her thoughts about back to last night. She had started drinking because of you, you guessed it, Kaden. Again. He was the only person who seemed to be making her miserable lately. Lucy just wished she could know what was going on. Why was he with Adia? Why was he holding her captive? Why did he feel the need to keep the truth from her? All the questions were increasing her resentment towards him. He was holding back and she didn't like it one bit. She wanted to know what she seemed to losing her best friend to. If he were going to keep things from her, Lucy could not help but think that she'd be better off without him. The paranoia was driving her insane. She was tired of hearing everyone say that he and Adia should be together and that there was obviously something going on. She should not be hearing all of this from everyone else. She should be hearing it straight from her best friend, straight from Kaden. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to agree with her, but he seemed to demand that courtesy from her. Logically, he was being hypocritical and a horrid friend.
however when she was in his presence, she melted. She could not stay angry, despite the fact that she had every reason to be pissed off at him. He got angry at her when she held back, so she was perfectly able to be equally upset. However, deep down, she knew it was so much more than that. It was hard watching the person that she loved more than anything seem to want to be with someone else. She pondered this, which only increased the pounding in her head. Finally, the need for pain killers got the best of her and she stood cautiously on shaky legs. She had not been this ill after a night of drinking since her first college party. She waited for the slight dizziness to pass before moving in search of pain killers. Her search was thankfully successful. After getting a glass of water, she quickly downed the water, washing down the painkillers. A few moments, she was rushing to the bathroom and relieving her body of the painkillers she had just swallowed. Coughing and wiping her mouth, Lucy leaned back from the toilet bowl and wiped her mouth. She sat there for a moment, retching several more times before finally standing. She made a mental note to sip the water instead of hastily gulping it down. Two more painkillers settled in her mouth and she sipped water until she successfully swallowed the pills. Only time would tell if her attempt at relieving her killer headache would be successful.
with her headache subsiding, Lucy decided coffee was exactly what her poor, exhausted body required. She had to be awake for class that afternoon. She had seemed to have chosen a bad time to drink, but it had seemed perfectly necessary at the time. Dressing herself in warm, comfortable clothing, she ventured out of her dorm and onto campus in search of the cafe. The sun blinded her and she groaned, swearing under her breath. She was full of bitterness, regret and hatred right now. She hated Kaden and Adia for making her feel the need to drown herself in tequila. She hated Adia for further pushing her desire to drink. Most of all, Lucy hated herself for being weak. She hated herself for being too cowardly to just tell Kaden that she didn't want him hanging out with Adia because she was in love with him. It was more complicated than coming out and saying it, especially now since he seemed to enjoy being with Adia. The pessimistic thoughts weren't helping her and she just sunk further into self-pity and self-loathing. She wanted to get this coffee and get it over with. Upon entering the cafe, she ordered a strong coffee and sat down, waiting for it to be brought to her. Her head fell into her hands as she willed her mind to go blank. She was tired of thinking. She was tired of feeling. She wanted complete numbness, at least so she could enjoy her coffee.
|
|
|
|
Post by julian on Dec 5, 2009 23:43:23 GMT -5
 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - ( LULU ?! OUTFIT. 836 WORDS. COMPLETE! ) "BREAKDOWN" LYRICS ARE CREDIT TO SEETHER CREDIT TO OH SO COOPERNATURAL ! @ CAUTION 2.0 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
A pair of bright blue eyes opened, to find a quiet room. The sun hadn't quite made itself known, so a blue hue overcame the walls and made awareness uncertain. The sick tiredness of the night before washed over him, as he kept himself in that bed. His blankets wrapped over just enough of his body to prevent anyone from seeing that his lower half was unclothed, not that there was anyone to witness it. Kaden peered over to the side of his bed and saw an empty space. White sheets crowded and crumbled with an imprint of Adia's body left behind. A deep sigh filled the boy's chest and released itself full of confusion, guilt and despair. He felt used, but at the same time, relieved and thankful to have avoided the morning after conversation. Honestly, he didn't want to have the talk with Adia, right now. He had to figure things out for himself, before they decided what exactly the hell was going on here. There were things in the past that he couldn't see past, but being who he was, understood that mistakes are made. He couldn't judge her for it, but at the same time, he felt that same resentment toward her for ruining things between the two.
He couldn't help but hate himself for that same reason. He'd been at fault for the ongoing riff between Lucy and himself, whether he'd like to admit it out loud or not. He scolded her for keeping secrets from him, that he thought he deserved to know, and intern did the same to her. No, it was worse than that. She may have kept her relationship with Brody a secret, whatever that might be, but he had lied directly to her face, and smiled through it all. Every time she'd ask him if he was alright or wondered what was spinning around in his head, he just put on a show and told her that it was all okay. Even when she asked him if he was hiding anything, he'd said No. Kaden may have been an overprotective, possessive asshole, but now he was a lying hypocrite too.
The entire way to the cafe, Kaden could think of nothing else but the aching confusion that sat in his stomach. A hurt that was so intense, that it actually caused him physical discomfort. He had hurt his best friend, and was in the middle of a crisis with his ex. He couldn't help but wonder if last night had only been a one time thing, and if it was his fault that Lucy had found herself in the arms of Brody O'Connor. The realization of the situation had overcome him, and he'd found himself overwhelmed by the whole show. His heart was torn, in more ways than one, and he'd never in his life been prepared for how to fix it. On one hand, he had Adia. A girl he knew that he loved and who loved him back. Of course, she'd walked out on him, after murdering his child without giving him a chance to speak. Then on the other, he had his best friend, who he would do anything for. A girl that even he couldn't deny, he'd loved with his entire heart. And she was being dishonest and letting her new boy toy talk about Kaden like he was nothing. Even if he and Adia were together, he wouldn't stand for her putting down his best friend. He didn't understand why Lucy did.
While standing in line, Kaden had decided to become a traitor to his drug of choice and choose a hot chocolate. He wasn't sure if it was because he'd just wanted a fix, or if he'd missed his best friend so much that subconsciously he'd chosen one of her favorite beverages. As luck would have it he was about to find out, turning to face the cafe with his drink in hand. His eyes scanned the tables, and when he had decided upon an empty one, his mind was swayed immediately. There sitting alone, was a brunette who hadn't been in his life in a long time. He couldn't help but want to walk over to see her, but had a feeling things wouldn't turn out very well. Kaden hesitated at first, but just like we all knew he would, made his way over to Lucy with no intension of an argument.
It wasn't until he'd gotten a little closer to her, that he'd noticed dark circles under her eyes. She'd seemed to be a bit paler than normal, and to be quite honest, looked like she'd had one hell of a night. "You look tired." he spouted, a slight smile upon his lips as he carefully watched his words. It might not have mattered, though. Lucy was smart enough to know that you look tired meant you look like crap, but hopefully she'd be grateful that he'd had sense enough to use tact and be polite about it.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - if s-s-sexy never left then why's everybody on my shit. gahhh, i get distracted too easily. does that mean i have a tiny brain? = O must be, i forgot to say complete.
|
|
|
|
Post by lucille on Dec 6, 2009 18:18:58 GMT -5
where can i turn? cause iNEED SOMETHING MORE. SURROUNDED BY UNCERTAINTY.KADEN WILSON , 1287 WORDS , CLOTHING , COMPLETE
stomach churning, her coffee was finally brought to her and she took a cautious sip. It burned her tongue and down her throat, but Lucy was beyond caring. If she were able, she would have downed the coffee in seconds and requested a second. However, she had already learned her lesson that morning and was taking it slow. She waited for the coffee to settle into her stomach before she raised the cup to her lips once more. The heated liquid burning her insides wasn’t a pleasant feeling, but she treasured it anyway. It was proof that Lucy was still living, although she wanted to die. This was, without a doubt, the most intense hangover the poor girl had suffered through in a while. It was her own fault, of course, but she found it easier to lay the blame on Adia and partly her best friend. She would feel guilty for it, but at this moment, she was beyond caring. The only emotion Lucy had room to feel was self-pity. It may have been wrong, but the brunette felt as if she were the only one who would offer that to her. Who could she reveal her real feelings to in order to get sympathy for the depth of the situation at hand. No one knew, that she was aware of, of her intense feelings for Kaden. Even if it was common knowledge, what did it matter? Her best friend, the one person she wanted, needed, more than anyone else, was in love with his ex-girlfriend. He need not say it, nor admit it to himself. Lucy knew him well enough to see it. It tore her apart, seeing the affection he held for her, knowing that he would never feel that towards her. It would always be platonic and heart-wrenching.
a familiar, deep voice coaxed her head from her hands. Before seeing his tall frame, she knew who was standing by her. She motioned to the chair across from her, temporarily ignoring the words that had come from his mouth. She knew what he was really saying. She had enough sense to not be offended, as she knew she probably looked just as bad as she felt. Honestly, she couldn’t care less what was said. Those trivial things weren’t important when one felt like their head was about to explode. “And I feel like hell,” she responded, laughing bitterly and regretting the action as it caused her head to pound. She groaned inaudibly and returned her head back to her hands. Bitter. That was a word that described how she felt about everything perfectly. She was bitter. There was a lot to feel that way about. She was full of regret also. She regret her decision to attempt to drink her pain away. She had seen what that had down to Kaden. Shouldn’t she have known better? When she was in the position of needing relief from issues, reason was thrown out the window. She picked up her coffee and took another, slightly longer, sip from it. So much was aching to be spoken to her best friend. He was sitting across from her, acting like nothing had happened. Lucy admired him for being able to push everything side, but Lucy couldn’t. Looking at him reminded her of everything that they’d had and everything that she felt was being lost. How was she supposed to tell him that because of everything he was doing, she felt like she was not only losing an important friendship, but part of herself also. The situation was further complicated because no matter how much she wanted to hate him, she couldn’t. No matter how much she wished he would just leave, she couldn’t help but hold on tight.
placing her elbows on the table, she supported her head in one hand and traced the rim of her coffee cup with the other. It was an attempt to focus elsewhere, so her thoughts would stop wandering to deeper issues that should not be handled while she was in this state. If she were honest, she was probably still affected by the alcohol with the amount she had consumed and the limited time she had slept. It had not been long enough to it to completely leave her system just yet. “So what are you doing here?” She was surprised to find the harsh undertones that had accompanied the words. Lucy had certainly not meant them, nor had she realised they would escape. She attempted a smile, her slight attempt at apologising without saying the words out loud. What was wrong with her? That, of course, was not a question she would actually answer or she would be there all day listing her faults. The main one would be her cowardly nature. Hard to believe that all of this could’ve been avoided if Lucy would just open her mouth and speak those three words she was dying to say. All of their problems, all of the fights, all of the doubts would end with that small gesture. It seemed so simple. Speaking three simple words to him and watching all their worries fade away. However, she just could not bring herself to do it. Why was it so difficult? She knew the answer, having pondered this issue many times, both whilst in his presence and not. Her position was difficult. If only one of them could see the other how people saw them. They would realise just how blind they had both been. Lucy pined for the days when things were simple. She missed the days where they would spend the day playing tag or building towers with his blocks and whatever else it was that they had done.
never could she recall a desire like the one she felt now. It was a mix of things, but it was so intense that it almost physically hurt. Used to fighting for what she wanted, the brunette was quickly learning that no matter how intense the want or need for it, there were no guarantees. It was depressing, yes, but that was life. “You don’t look too hot yourself. Long night?” Once again, those bitter tones escaped. She did not know what was wrong. Lucy had thought she was better at controlling herself. It seemed her intense hatred for the situation and what she thought had occurred the night before – which funnily enough, actually did happen – between Adia and Kaden fuelled an unquenchable anger that she could not escape. Lucy was jealous. It pumped through her veins and just intensified her red-hot rage. Yes, she had seen Kaden with other girls and it had not affected her as badly, but it was because of her already immense dislike for Adia. She was selfish, she was nosy and she was frustrating as all she seemed capable of doing was rubbing in her face just how special she and Kaden were. Lucy did not need the constant reminder of what she would never have, yet was unwillingly supplied with it. The only thing the brunette could hope for was the fact that Kaden would assume her bad mood was because of her fragile form, rather than her frustration at the situation and the things that had led her to this fragile state. Well, she may just help push that into his mind. “Sorry,” she mumbled, lifting a hand to rub her eyes. “I should have just stayed in my dorm. I’m not fit to socialise.” She forced a laugh, although it lacked any of its normal characteristics. It was entirely fake and entirely unconvincing, although she was praying Kaden would have the common sense to just accept it, rather than start another bicker between them.
|
|
